Numb
An emotional lockdown
Fearful
That once the walls crumble
There will be no relief
Sorrow
Runs deep
Permeates my very essence
If I allow myself to feel
The full depths
Would I ever recover
Fear of getting “better”
Of never getting “better”
I’m not sure I could bear
That this is the way
It will always be
Yearning
For a family that doesn’t exist
For what worth have i
If I’m rejected by those
Who share my blood
That nameless ache
Undefinable
Intangible
Pervasive
Both physically
And in my pysche
A part of me
Steadfast
True
Who am I?